QA 4

Wow. More questions. This set is not all from the same person, but all surfaced in my email in the last day.

1. now that you're married - with child - is there anything you wish you had done while you were a bachelor?? (dinesh seems to be the last one in the group, so make sure there are a few things he can add to his list).

I feel like I've gone through all the stages right on time. I met Wifey when I was meant to meet Wifey. If I'd met her any earlier. I wouldn't have been ready to handle it. And now we're on the path that we were meant to be on together. So I can't really say I'd wish I'd done anything too different, because everything prior to marriage somehow got me to where I am now.

Marriage, mortgage, kid, this all ties you down a little. There's more responsibility, but I don't think most of the things I want to do are foreclosed. I'd still like to write a real novel some day. I'd still like to sing the national anthem at a baseball game. These things are still possible. And if not, I make my kids do them and live vicariously through them.

If anything I guess I wish I'd traveled a little more. Not that I can't travel now. But traveling alone is different, less complicated, and seeing a little more of the world would have been nice.

1. Did 9-11 have anything to do with you buying a ring, proposing, getting married and buying a house in such a short (I think it was 6 mos or less) time? Why / why not?

Interesting. I remember flipping on the TV that morning just in time to watch the first tower fall. Absolutely shocking. I had a conference in downtown San Francisco that day, and I did pause before ultimately deciding to go. But the whole day I and everyone I seemed to meet were in a complete daze.

I remember a few days later, sitting with Not-Yet-Wifey just being depressed and wondering if this was a sign of the end of the world. So we did get through that rough time together, but we were already on the way. I can't remember ever consciously thinking that the ring, proposal, house or wedding had anything to do with that. We were just ready. Or at least as close to ready as we were ever going to get. The timeline just seemed to suit us. Once we knew we wanted to get married, everything else just fell into place. There wasn't a reason to take more time.

I have heard the urban legend that more babies than average were born roughly 9 months after 9/11, but I don't know that to be true.

2. Do you like cats or dogs better and why?

Right now, the little one can say recognize and say, "dog", but she can't say "cat". I've been teling Wifey that she's hinting at something.

Actually, my preference is cats. As a person who seems to find his own way of doing things, I tend to appreciate a little more independence in my pets. Dogs are loyal, great, and they'll do tricks great, but cats just seem like much more graceful creatures. But it's not a strong preference. If my kid(s) wanted a dog instead, I could roll with that.

3. What is is like to now be a relative of a friend (i.e. Kev)? Do you find yourself acting differently towards him?

Not really. I think the interests align in either case. You wish the best for your friends and you also wish the best for your brothers-in-law, so I don't think I really act different in either case. In many ways it's actually easier. I mean, I know the guy already. No real surprises. I guess it could be rocky if one of the relationships goes sideways for some reason, but I so no reason not to recommend that kind of set up if you can find it.

And when we do family events or just hang out at the family stuff, we're comfortable talking or just goofing off. A couple weeks ago, I was randomly programming karaoke songs for him to sing. It was quite entertaining.

If anything, I guess it means we're tied together for the rest of our lives. He's an uncle to my kid. I'll be an uncle for his. Not a bad thing.

As parents we like it when either KC or A & W hang out at the same parties with us. It means we can try and pass the kid off for a few minutes and eat together for a change.